Friday, June 30, 2006

Sneezing my way thru

Achoo!!! Sneezing my way thru the net.. Gosh! I've been sneezing since yesterday mrng.. Which was the reason why all my plans for yesterday was cancelled... Be going threading with Amu next weekend... Yes, finally I'm doing it.. Amu initially thought it was a joke & she would severe all ties with me if I suddenly back out... HAHAHA!!! No I won't. I've got certain goals to acheive by end of this year... All thanks to Mun, who somehow managed to clear my mind.. In many ways....

Been looking high & low for my getaway with all my dearest dudettes... Going to LANGKAWI.. And all of us are pitching in to looking for tour info for 3D2N... So far, I've checked out this VILLA for 280RM per night but its SUPER BIG... However, there isn't any transportation available... So there I was, searching all thru the free & easy tours, and guess what, they don't include airfare tax which is $121 bucks... So its like if the promo is $229/pax, we've gotta add $121 to it... Making it $350 for our 3D2N trip...

But if we were to go on a BACKPACKING spree... As in, literaly us with backpacks & taking a bus or train from JB, its gonna be cheaper.. I can say that that its gonna cost less than $300 bucks... And another plus point, if MYR rates are getting better, WE ARE SO VERY LUCKY!!!! The current rates standing is MYR 2.295 for every $1. Hopefully it goes up to 2.30 or something... Itu boleh dikatakan 'joli katak'......


Alrights.... Got my dental on monday... Wonder what colour to change?? And yes, my teeth are all pretty... All straight... And I can still play the flute.. Speaking of flute, my sis is bugging me to buy the Yamaha Flute that cost 200 buckeroos... Where on earth can I get that amount when I'm planning my getaway to Langkawi....

School starts on Tues for me... Can't wait to get my life back on track... And another thing, I seriously gotta muster all the courage that I've got in me to talk to that someone... Everytime I click on the msn, I feel REALLY bad & I chicken out.. So I just click it off... Somewhere, somehow I've REALLY gotta clear the air... A new half yr is starting & I've gotta make a GOOD head start... No more bumps (if I can prevent it) in my life anymore. I've got certain goals to attain... And hopefully I pray hard that I can achieve them.. In school & my individual self...

Sunday, June 25, 2006

Looking Back

A couple of weeks ago I stepped into a relationship for just one night. Yes I know it was just for one night but it sure made me think alot about guys...

No, not that I'm saying that I have a negative picture painted in my mind about guys but for some reasons, however you hate them for what ever reasons, there will forever be a need for them. May it be for companionship, love, affection or sex, somewhere in every women, there's a need for a woman to be with a man.

When I stepped into that short relationship for just that one night, I really wonder whether there's any decent guy out there for me left. Someone who knows me well & likes me for who I am & not for how I look. Yes, I know where I stand when compared to some other girls that are way prettier than me but sometimes, it takes more than good looks to know a person's attributes.

But until that night, I realised on how much I've missed being attached & how grateful I am for having a great friend with me. How comfortable it was sitting together at night & just talked things through. How a hug & a cuddle seemed appropriate at ALL the right times...

Maybe I've stopped seeing & meeting guys for a while, which resulted to me just sticking to a couple of my old guy friends from school. May it be from OI, MI or Broadrick. And I thank god that these people are really nice gentlemen.

I don't know, maybe god has planned a path for me that is not as clear as others. Maybe the reason for that is for me to really think through hard enough for myself to make my choices in life. I am blessed that right now I am not seeing anyone because I have plans & goals to achieve without the existence of a significant other yet. Who knows, maybe this significant other will appear once my goals & ambitions have been achieved.



Right now, I've got loads of things to get back to. Such as school which starts on the 4th. And I also am looking for promotions for a short trip to Malaysia. Going with my beloved SISTAZ.. Looking for good promotions to resorts & maybe cruises. Just looking ard to co-ordinate the schedules & all... Gosh! I am so excited about the trip...

Thursday, June 22, 2006

Jason Mraz - Life is Wonderful
It takes a crane to build a crane
It takes two floors to make a story
It takes an egg to make a hen
It takes a hen to make an egg
There is no end to what I'm saying
It takes a thought to make a word
And it takes a word to make an action
It takes some work to make it work
It takes some good to make it hurt
It takes some bad for satisfaction
La la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life is full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Al la la la la
It takes a night to make it dawn
And it takes a day to you yawn brother
It takes some old to make you young
It takes some cold to know the sun
It takes the one to have the other
It takes no time to fall in love
But it takes you years to know what love is
It takes some tears to make you trust
It takes some years to make it rust
It takes some dust to make it polished

Ha la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life is full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is so full of
Ah la la la la la la life is so rough
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life is full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is our love
Ah la la la la la
It takes some silence to make sound
It takes a loss before you found it
It takes a road to go nowhere
It takes a toll to know you care
It takes a hole to make a mountain
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life is full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is oh love
Ah la la la la la la love is all sorts of
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la la life is full circle
Ah la la la la la la life is holla holla
Ah la la la la la la next up bushwalla-walla
Ah la la la la la la life is wonderful
Ah la la la la la
This song has been bugging me for ages.. It just has a deeper meaning to it.. There's some other things that I wanna put it but I just don't have the pictures so I can't explain them. Been watching the World Cup lately with my dad. I think that's the only father daughter thing that I've done since Father's Day. Hey, it is a time for bonding. Right???
Jo: I have to agree with you. Forgiving is part of recovering & going on with my life. Thanks for all the advise you've given me. Muacks!
I've gotta stop here.. See ya!

Sunday, June 18, 2006

Why does it hurts so bad?

I'm on my toes now... Why your asking? Well I'm going somewhere formal later... Its been a long while since I've dressed up & all.. I mean, I think I'm the most 'so-chai' girl one would ever meet.

Went to catch Scary Movie 4 & The Omen yesterday.. Ya I know that exactly one week ago, I was in a DEEP SHIT MESS... Sorry for the french. But its so very MESSED up. I think that' s the reason why I went to catch the movies. To make me forget about stuff... Good DISTRACTION...

"No strings attached" What do you think of it? I seriously think that it would satisfy both parties. I know its bad but well, what else can I say? It won't happen.
Ok, enough of it already.

Scary Movie 4 was FUNNY... Kelakar habis...Especially with the japanese ghost who spoke 'branded japanese items'. It was hilarious..

The Omen. Well, it was a sad ending.. Seriously, I got confused a little with the show...


Yesterday mrng, I got a miss call ard 3 .24 am.. Wonder who called. Maybe it was just a wrong number... But I know it's not someone I would expect. I know... I just know....

Tuesday, June 13, 2006

Platonic Friends?

Here I am, laughing... About what you guys think.. Well about this book that I actually bought entittled 'Just Friends'... It was really weird cos I've just realised that for some reason, a boy & a girl can never just be 'best friends' cos I've seen too many things happening before my very eye which contradicts this statement. Its either it'll work out or not. I guess there can never be 'platonic friends' btwn a guy & a girl...

I think there's nothing else I can say right now... Been thinking too much.. And oh yeah, I'm hitting the books again in July.. I'm so glad that there's a door that's opening me even after all that I've done... And like I've said before, I'M GOING TO KEEP MYSELF BUSY WITH SCHOOL... Nothing is ever gonna distract me from school... And with me staying in school, I really hope that I'll end up with a degree later. Staying in school is good. Keeps you busy & it's benificial too.. You'll get something tangible (degree) at the end of it.


All right my dears... That's all I've gotta say for now...
Toodles.....

Monday, June 12, 2006

Back to the usual me

I'm back to the usual me right now.. No more crazy stuff... Gonna stuff myself with books.. AGAIN... I know that its bad to channel my self & energy to just one thing.. But I'm used to it... Hope that it works this time...

Something that I discovered that turned out to be very true.. Here it goes:

Women can fake an orgasm but men can fake whole relationships

Saturday, June 10, 2006

Mr Cinderella

First & foremost, when I wrote this entry, I was deprieved from sleep for a night.. Imagine someone sleeping for abt 1 hr at night & another 45 mins later in the mrng before she got back to doing her usual things...


Went out with my Mr Cinderella this mrng... It was an incredible outing... Even though my eyes were dead tired, I just stuffed myself with coffee at Mac East Coast... It was fun... And guess what Mr Cinderella said, "U drive like ur scared of driving..." Monster!!!!

How it went ? Well lets just say that I met him at ard 3 after his session. Then we headed to Mac East Coast to get coffee cuz I so very needed it... When I met him, he looked WAY different then before he was in NS.. And I really liked the new look.. The messy grunge rugget look... Its funny though that what appears to be so rough in texture & all was actually soft & conforting...

We got a spot at East Coast to chill... He was my Mr Cinderella for the night... For some reason, he's not going to be the same when dawn breaks & the spell is broken. We had some really fun stuff. Seriously, its only with him that I do LOADS of crazy stuff... What's new & unusual? Anyway, when we were together, we had a heart to heart talk about stuff that was bothering both us most & stuff...

When were together, he was just WONDERFUL! Everything was great... And the best part about me & Mr Cinderella, we can ask each other ANYTHING & we'll be honest about it.. He even can read what's lying between the lines in our converation... And he has his ways to help me out when I really need it the most. There's lots of reasons why I like him.

1) He can make me smile
2) He knows what I'm thinking
3) He knows what I'm going thru - being emphathetic
4) He's always there when I fall
5) He knows that I'm like a wall, appearing strong & steady but no one ever knows what goes on with/in me...


And at this stage, he knows that all that feelings I have for him is all buried & cemented deep in me & there's gonna be some way, good or bad, for me to built a door or just drill through that cemented wall... And getting it all out....

I know, he sounds like the guy for me.. But it can never happen... I know I've said that our relationship in the past was just short & painless, I realised that it isn't true... It was too painful that I just kept quiet about it & buried them deep in me with work & books... Like they say, what lies beneath...

Remember when I said that I'll never fall in too deep in a relationship cuz I know that when its all over, i'll ever recover from it.. It was only today that I realised that he & I go back a long way. Way before Darwin was even my bf. I didn't know why it took me so long to realise it. That the secret that I kept since I was 14 was going to end up like this.. And now, I've known him as long as he knew his bestfriend. Its that long & we go way back. Like about 9-10 yrs.. Its long alright.. And I ask myself, why did I did this to my life... This time round, it has gotten way too deep then I can ever expect & seriously don't know how to get out from it.....


What am I to say here? That I've messed up with things right now? It can never work out.. I told myself beforehand that it WOULDN'T work but why does he still knocks on my door? It can never be REAL!!!!!! This challenge.. IS TOUGH... How am I to take it? Can I survive it...

Yes he's gonna be there for me irregardless of how many yrs will pass by. Its just so messed up SO BAD that I really don't know how to fix it... And no amount to work can ever escape this large heap of problem ...

Mr Cinderella, no matter how many comfort cuddles & hugs you can ever give me, there's nothing you can do. You're in your world while I'm here in mine... These two worlds can never become one...

Friday, June 09, 2006

As usual, things have been VERY rushy for me... One followed by another...

First was the big batch of Mothers' Day bouquet that Nor ordered from me... And you know what she said? She said that when she gets engaged or married, she wants me to do the gubahan for her... And the best part was that, she said since she has to give it to the other side, don't make it so nice... Or maybe do for both her side & the guy's side... Tu betul lah...Tak tahan ketawa terbahak-bahak dgr dgn Nora, her sis....

After that, I became my dad's secretary for a while... Some May Day Speech cuz he got an award during May Day... And guess what my mom said why it was ME who had to write the speech.. Cuz I got a B4 for GP... That's all... I was like HUH??? Entah macam mane tah boleh dapat B4 for GP pun tak tau... And I wasn't the only one... Quite a HANDFULL got that grade... KUDOS to Mrs Vertri....

The other day, I went out with Jo & her little god bro Matthew who's 11 yrs old... It was fun going out with him... And its been a long time since I've gone out with a kid that age... It was fun hanging out at the kids section.... And he's very well behaved & VERY observent. I mean, when he first saw me, the braces sort of facinated it cuz he was looking at it for quite some time.. I always get it when I'm with kids... There was even once, this K1 second cousin of mine, he actually touched it.. He's one brave curious kid... And I think he was the only kiddo who DARED to do it.. Some were scared cuz it looks painful & gives u goosebumps... I know...

Ok, back to that day when I was out with Jo. Another thing that he saw was that I have a driving licence.. He went like " You have a driving licence?" And I said, "Yes I do." I think he saw it when I was making my payment at the counter....


Speaking of making my payment, I finally got my swimwear... Got it at only 35 bucks at Tannlines... I know, for those who buy swimwear there, you gals are going like "AAAAAAAARRRRRGGGGHHHH!!!" When I told Amy abt it, she went like, "Ur lucky!"... And the funny thing was, I didn't know tat Jo was going swimwear shopping too.... Imagine both of us together looking for swimwear...... And she got hers too... A brown one.... While I got the blue one....

And today, I've got the car... Everyone is in KL...Actually since yesterday...Today, officially, its just me & grandpa so I have the car... MAYBE later tonight going out for a cruise..



ALrighty... Catch ya soon...