Getting the FEEL.....

Apparently its only now that I can feel the RAYA mood setting in. Even though my house is in complete mess, I just seek refuge in my room and BAM! I totally feel it. What's left would be to iron my kebayas and it will be all set..

Thank goodness last Dec I painted my room. So, the mess in my room is still bearable & I just have to clear some things to make my room spick & span. And the colour is beige, my fav colour. Initially I wanted to paint it red or green, like bright tones but I changed my mind while picking the colours because I'm they type of person who would like calm & soothing things. And during the exam stress period, I badly need that calamity & soothingness...

This year, its going to be the 4th year in running that I will not be receiving a wonderful Hari Raya card. The one that's especially written to me, with lots of love & sincerity. Haiz! Those days of which people will decide on the same colour of baju kurungs together. Those were the days...

Suprisingly, till today, no one can really please me that well. I'm a tough girl alright. Yes I can play the same game if you play the same game but when its a serious one, please don't kid me...

A long time ago, I would definately want to settle down, have little 'devils' running around and be happy. Spend my mornings with him playing with my hair, or admiring me while I sleep. And how well he fits into your body, every curve & angle. Knowing how well your hands fits into his palm. And when you have your kids running around, never failing to make you laugh.. When you have found that special somone, it will all be perfect.

But when I look at it(marriage) again, I think I would be missing alot of things if I continue with that initial plan. RIght now, I find that I'm more afraid of settling down then ever. Why is that so? Because there's alot of RESPONSIBILITY that goes along with it. And all your obstacles that you would be facing when one enters into that stage of life. OMG! I am so unprepared. And I thought I was before.. Gheez. And lets not talk about childbirth YET..

Things that I want to achieve in life before I enter that other stage in life;

1) Continue with my education
2) Buy my MINI COOPER
3) Earn big bucks before I turn 35
4) Continue looking out for people who might interest me.
-> I have yet to meet someone who loves to travel, enjoys the outdoor (meaning trying out alot of incredible things that have the thrill factor), never fails to make me laugh, good chemistry (VERY IMPT) & loves me for what I am.
5) When I've finally earn all that I want, I'll settle down with the right guy (if I EVER meet him), stop working as an accountant & start with my own bridal business